1. Anaheim – Known as the Kawhi Leonard of CCHL. Has silently built a solid team over the years. Defense is the strong suit in Anaheim. Led by two number one defensemen in Ekblad and Lindholm. With a young JB in net. I expect this team to win some games. Playoff team.
2. Arizona – The one who runs the show in the Cook household. Queens team is led by juggernaut Marco Roy. This team will be a force in the future once Cozens is created and Kappo has another year of rates under his belt. Queen does not trade often, but she has slowly fixed that atrocious team she inherited. Not a playoff team yet. But hope is there.
3. Boston – A man who gives Brent Burns, Joe Thornton and Sidney Crosby a run for their money with his GQ, Forbes style beard. A defense heavy team with studs like Pietrangelo, McAvoy and Tuuka in net. Oshie will probably walk. Middle of the pack team.
4. Buffalo – My boy Shirley Temple is looking to repeat. This is a man who is willing to do what it takes to repeat. Acquired Tom Wilson to solidify his bottom 6. I can see a high possibility of a repeat. He will most likely be a lottery pick in 2025. Cup favourite this season.
5. Calgary – Chad is also a man willing to do what it takes to win. Lost in the cup finals last year. But what did he do in the off season to become better? Literally I do not know. All I know is Buffalo got better. Did Calgary get better? Chad? Hello??? Playoff team, I don’t know if he is a contender.
6. Carolina – My boy Elsa got hit with a huge blow prior to the start of the season with most of his core walking. Sucks. However, the economy needs it. Carolina will find a way to sell these guys to contenders. Chad, I’m looking at you.
7. Chicago – My fellow Tim Hortons, double double with 3 sugar drinking pal Russ Walsh has built an epic team my gosh. I didn’t even know they had Eichel and Laine. Add Drasaitil, Kopitar, Domi and White to that mix. Solid goaltending as well in Bobrovsky and Saros. The defense is suspect however offense is more valuable. Definitely a contender. Perhaps a ? Also, Russ fair warning brother, Evan Fitzpatrick will be given a hefty offer sheet.
8. Colorado Nick. I remember his Avalanche being in the finals when I joined late a season and a half ago. Sim was clearly broken lol. Solid offensive group in Colorado led by Schiefele, Horvat, Zibanejad. Defense is suspect however Niskanen is rated generously here. Fringe playoff team.
9. Columbus – My fellow hangover 4 movie star aka we will be having patio drinks and laughing at Ottawa’s CCHL team when you are in town. Steph traded his young guns for some of the best two-way players in the sim game. However, along with that, he traded for a tighter window. Perhaps this may be his year where he rebounds and brings the Jackets from the basement to the middle of the pack.
10. Dallas – My boy David Barbosa aka Mr. Whiskey. Dave understands me, and understands sim hockey. We have history. You know this history Dave. Cough Karlsson cough. Anyways, dave has an older team, middle of the pack. He has some nice young talent growing in the farm like Leason and Heponiemi. Vanelli was a steal. I failed to sign him when I had his rights. Turned out to have a hell of a rerate. Damn.
11. Detroit – Chris Cook aka Chris Cook. I like his roster. Both Tkachuks, Dubois, Sergachev, Lindholm. Has built a nice team. That’s it though. Nice doesn’t get you to the holy grail. I see Arizona going farther than Detroit. Good guy though.
12. Edmonton – Stefan is my boy. He sees the sim world in a way that I see. Superior. Stefan has a sumit minded mindset (this is a compliment). The man has a team that can play now, tomorrow and 20 seasons from now. Tyler Soy at his current contract and rate is an absolute bargain. Led by an elite defender in Rasmus and one of the top defensive defenders in the game in Russell – along side some excellent strategies and line juggling, I see Edmonton making the yoffs. Also check out Jake Oettinger my god this guy is the next Brodeur of sim leagues.
13. Florida – Holy fuck I just realized there is no Florida. Still better than New York Islanders though.
14. Los Angeles – MY BOY JAMESON FLETCHER WAS THE TALK OF THE TOWN THIS OFF SEASON BASICALLY LANDING SUBBAN BACK IN UFA FOR A SWEETHEART DEAL I THINK THIS IS THE YEAR HIS TEAM RISES ABOVE AND GOES FROM BEING A FREQUENT FLYER TO OWNING A SEAT ON THE FLIGHT ITSELF. NOT A PLAYOFF TEAM THOUGH.
15. Minnesota – The Big BW has a team which is like a bowling ball. You don’t know if it’s going to go to the side gutters or if it’s going to get a touchdown home run strike. The friend part of me wants you to do well and show the league who is boss. But as owner of your first-round picks for the next two drafts, I hope you fail.
16. Montreal – GM of the Year and well deserved. I did not realize how stacked this team was until I clicked this team and realized how stacked it was. Panarin, Barkov, Larkin, DeBrincat, Gallagher, Hedman and Price?! This team is the dark horse this year. Contender status.
17. Nashville – Rups has put together a nice AHL squad which should be able to compete for the Calder cup this year led by Pacioretty, Huberdeau, Foligno, Stastny, Boeser, Dubinsky and Kuemper. AHL contender.
18. New Jersey – Zach has nicely built a properly structured sim team led by top rated goalie Braden Holtby, top 5 defenseman Erik Karlsson and superstar forward Taylor Hall. After acquiring Marcus Johansson, this team as the potential to do some damage this year. I can definitely foresee improvement from their lottery status last season.
19. New York Islanders – What is the recipe for a team that includes McDavid, Kane, Shipyachov, Weber, Suter, Crawford? Missing the playoffs and ultimately below a team from Pennsylvania. Sorry Scott.
20. New York Rangers – OH JAHNNNNNNNNN HEADS UP MY TEAM WILL BE GIVING YOUR TEAM NIGHTMARES ALL SEASON LONG JUST KNOW THAT WE WILL NOT GO GENTLE INTO THAT GOOD NIGHT, RAGE, RAGE.
21. Ottawa – I have been in sim leagues with Yann since the stone age. Let me start off by defining the verb of the word team. “To come together as a team to achieve a common goal.” Derived from the word team which is “a group of players forming one side in a competitive game or sport". This applies to Ottawa as they are not a team. They are just players on a team. Therefore, they will not come together as a team and achieve any goals. They will miss the playoffs.
22. Philadelphia – I toot my own horn enough on slack ill save you all the read.
23. Pittsburgh- Tommy Matheson is a cool guy. Met him in PHL 2. We made a trade that Mark Wharton got mad at me for. Pittsburgh has an old team led by Staal, Nash, Josi and McDonagh. He had an off year last season however it was not really an off year as his team is just not at par with the rest of the division. Fringe playoff team.
24. San Jose – Graham once posted a selfie and it was epic. Graham has a nice core built of with the likes of Marner, Ehlers, Nielsen, Brodie, Yandle, Reinhart and Mason. Definitely a playoff team.
25. St. Louis THE SELF-PROCLAIMED MELANCHOLY MAN OF MISSOURI MADE SOME BIG MOVES THIS OFF-SEASON ACQUIRING JOHANSEN TO ADD TO THAT CORE OF ABDELKADER, CALVERT, TIERNEY AND KELLER. SUPERSTAR GOALIE IN JAKE ALLEN IN NET. I SEE THIS TEAM WINNING 13 GAMES.
26. Tampa Bay – I think I asked daily whether Chris would move Kucherov. We made an epic Crosby deal last year which didn’t help his team. Maybe last year was a one off. A team with Schenn, Stamkos, Ejdsell, Kucherov, Vatrano, Dumba, Ellis and oh Nolan Patrick. You would hope he makes the playoffs. I would rank him as a playoff team but would not be surprised if he missed. Patrick will become an RFA.
27. Toronto – MY BOY RYAN HICKS OH LORD I THINK THIS WILL BE THE SEASON WHERE HIS EPIC SEASON LAST YEAR IS OVER SHADOWED BY A SUB PAR YEAR TO COME. TORONTO WILL HAVE A LOSING RECORD AND MISS THE PLAYOFFS WITH GUYS LILE MATTHEWS, LEE, HYMAN, SPEZZA, COUTURE, DOUGHTY, JONES AND GIBSON. Now that I typed that out, I think he will actually make the playoffs with this team lol.
28. Vancouver – Ryan is trying to build the modern-day Canucks but a lesser version. His team is a middle of the pack team, no matter how good Petterson is, he can’t carry LeBlanc and Co to the playoffs. Dahlin continues to grow and will get pivotal minutes for the team. Ryan has a solid prospect pool however we won’t see contention until season 21.
29. Vegas – Greg Almeida has probably the coolest name in sim hockey. Almeida reminds me of Tony Almeida from 24 the show. Epic show. Vegas is a playoff. Ovechkin, Pastrnak, Barzal, Kaprizov with Lindell and Slavin leading the back end. Hart is a stud. He is willing to do what it takes to win. Perhaps a deadline acquisition of a top defender can put this team over the top.
30. Washington – Kurt is a go getter. We made a monster deal involving Burns. I mention this because I own his first-round pick for the next 13 seasons. Kurt has a star-studded team led by Burns, Giroux, Tarasenko, Backstrom, Landeskog, Martinez and Anderson. They are one season removed from winning the cup and made a pretty solid run last year. But time will tell as what goes up must come down.
31. Winnipeg – Duran is a day one brother. We have been in sim leagues since I was 15. Winnipeg has a solid team led by Evander Kane, Tavares, Lucic, Hoffman, Hayes and Hellebucyk. The only question mark I would place is on that defense. Fringe playoff team.
32. Seattle – My boy Mike has an epic team. Niederreiter, Malkin, Mackinnon, Rantanen, Byfuglien, Hjalmarsson and Marty Jones. With Geno and Niklas on expiring deals and already rejecting the first attempt. This may be a season where Mike has to go all in to get maximal gains from this core. My offer for Geno still stands Mike.
33. Quebec – Chris Walsh, good guy, I lit a fire under his teams’ ass in FCL, don’t think I want to do the same here lol. Chris has a solid core led by elite rated Arvidsson, Crosby, Radulov (WHO IS ON THE BLOCK IF YOU DID NOT KNOW), Duclair and Klingberg. UPL looks like he will be a complete stud and Greiss is there to provide that veteran presence. Rumor has is that Joey Laleggia wants out.